ask for support ... learn to receive.

i started writing today what i thought i should be writing and anytime i do that, i realize i am closing. i am closing because the truth is so vulnerable and i haven’t fully accepted it yet. but these are the days i must get more open, i must get more honest.⁣

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as someone who has devoted my life to spirituality, understanding, and serving my dear sisters and brothers, i can be the hardest on myself. when life brings a challenge, i usually handle it like a pro. i see the lesson in it and i learn from it quickly. i am present through it.⁣

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but then come some days, like today, that bring a wave of grief and shame. days when i see myself attempting to escape but not being able to disconnect from the source within. i watch in awe as i find myself feeling empty, unworthy, and angry. what about all the work i’ve done? it seems in these moments, unrecognized. i feel unseen by the universe. ⁣

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but then i remind myself that life brings challenges and when we really feel the pain is when we know that we will experience massive growth. i love growth and i’m assuming you (reading this) love growth too. we are the type of people who seek but don’t get lost in the seeking. but sometimes, sometimes we do, and that is when the universe sends down a few "tests." ⁣

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a few reminders of our humanity, our shortness, our irritability. the beauty of being human, remembering that we are not above anyone. these challenges are humbling. they bring us back to community, back in touch with our deepest truth, that we are fragile. vulnerable. and because of this, we deserve to be well taken care of. but the one who does the taking care is the same one who needs to be taken care of. to acknowledge our needs, especially when we feel sad, is the most honorable thing one can do. to reach out for support when we are needing it is courageous. it takes heart to give. it takes bravery to receive. ⁣

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most of us that find ourselves in these spaces are givers. we love to give but how many of us can say we love to receive? that is the next step towards balance and harmony. seeing that receiving is as honorable as giving. if we don’t receive we continue to attract takers and takers have zero capacity to see our value. it is our responsibility to receive. it is our birthright and to deny ourselves of our birthright is a form of self-hate... perhaps even self-abuse. ⁣

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no wonder those who give without boundaries have takers swarming them faster than they can blink an eye. i’m not going to lie, some times i fall into this category. in life, we have to constantly remind ourselves to balance our energies. to recognize our needs and to ask for support. period. not when necessary. not when we crash and burn. but to just see our needs for what they are and to get support. we are not above support. ⁣

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#getoutthetrap